Thursday, October 28, 2010

Memory lane bonfire FAIL!

First of all, only I could start with a choice of cleaning my room or baking a pie and end up with a half burnt box full of crap and a collapsed lung!! Let me retell what just happened and you all will get how disturbed yours truly is.

As I was considering my choices, I chose against baking a pie since it's better eaten worm and no one was awake but me. So off I went to clean my room armed with plastic bags and all. I was nearly done with my first bag (it would've taken at least twenty to clean that dump!). I started finding stuff that I no longer wanted around. I gathered those stuff in a box and thought "TORCH THAT MOTHER FUCKER!!!!". Yes I might be an environmentalist, but you could never take the little arsonist out of me! So on a dumb (very very very dumb) impulse I thought "it's a small box, why not do it in the bathroom?". In my defense, I just watched "Phoebe in Wonderland" and I'm not a PG movie fan, so I was extremely bored and disturbed. Plus, those Fanning girls scream child abuse and tend to creep me out and make me want to act out for some reason!

So I went to the bathroom with my two scented candles, my box, my least favorite body spray (to start the fire silly!), matches, and myself. I closed the door, sprayed the body spray, lit a match, and BOOM we have a bonfire! At first it didn't smoke that much, but I knew what was coming. Surprisingly (more like stupidly, disturbingly, or suicidally) enough I just didn't care! So the more fire, the more smoke, the harder it got to breath (DUH! naturally!!). But instead of putting the fire out, I turned on the water, faucet, shower head and all. Still I felt like I was choking and my lung were killing me (wimps!), so you'd think that I'd put the fire out, right? Wrong!! I wet the hem of my nighty and started breathing through it while watching that majestic fire. As I was staring and bravely (stupidly) suffocating, I heard a knocking sound that brought me back to sane land. I thought "OMG now I'm really dead!" So I sprayed the box with water, which normally generated more smoke, more choking effect, more thinking "SUMAIAH YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT! CLASS A MORON!!". As I was choking to death, I lit the two scented candles (as if they had a chance while that mess was around!) Lifted the box while still hot and partly burning and threw it out. Went back to my bathroom because I remembered that the spray was right next to the candles (stupid). Then went down to prepare some fa7am for bo5oor. As I was doing this I started to realize that there probably wasn't any knocking, because if there were any I wouldn't have been able to do any of this!

I know now that what I did was very stupid (knew it all along, I just like starting fires :p) but you can't say that I didn't handle it like a pro! I still smell like BBQ Thursday and I'm not sure how the house smells because I think that I burnt smelling right out of me. So people of earth if I die of complications or shame if someone confronted me with this. Know that I don't regret this the least :D
As for my room, I think it's meant to be filthy forever!
And I might bake that pie tomorrow.
But now I have to go in, and down to my room to sleep the rush away. The weather is extremely sexy and I don't want to go, bs my eyes are hurting from the smoke :(
So good night people who now know for sure that I'm unwell. May you hear of more Sumaiah styled craziness in the near future :p

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Lame Updates

- I made a loaf of brioche bread, then I made some french toast with it! Fortunately the eggs didn't come from my hen farm, because I'm not that lame after all.

- Mesho bit me (yes she bites, MOTAWA7ESHA!!) Two days ago and it still hurts. It bruised badly too :(
I think I might have rabies now because I'm pretty sure that she has it! :p

- I guess that's it! My life is boring :s

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

A Journey to Find the Lady Inside?

I think that I might be challenging myself not to curse! Most of the people that I'm surrounding myself with are not cool with the way I talk, so I'm not sure if I should ditch them or ditch the bitchy me? But then I thought maybe challenging myself to be girly and shit (shut up zain!) Might be fun, because I'm so bored and I could use a good challenge.

I will be promising to be polite and nice for a whole week. No bitcheness, no back lashing, no cursing, no nothing! Who here thinks that I could pull it off?

Freezing Stinky Cry Baby?

I feel like shit since I can't smell or taste. I can't till if I stink or if mom's sneaking onions or other healthy vigies in my food:p
Speaking of mom, today she finally made me soup :D
I had to ask for it and she made it a day later but still I felt awwwwwwh! I'm really hard on my mom but I think I love her! Whatever, moving on!

My stupid bathroom mafy ella may bared (not normal cold, freezing cold!). I'm not a fan of hot baths, but freezing cold baths are not my thing either! So yesterday I was already miserable and when I got under the shower head and had a taste of that shocking surprise I went like *shock* *shiver* *gasp* *weap* *snif* *cough* *cry* *sneez* *freez* *die*! Except that I wasn't lucky enough to die, so I sat under the cold water tired and crying!! But it's ok since I'm having so much fun laughing about it now :p

I haven't left home since I've gotten sick, haven't left the sofa 7atta mo bs home! Is the weather still as sexy as it was when I last was out? I'm craving burgers and ice-cream, should I go get some?

Monday, October 18, 2010

High on Vitamin C Dust

- It took me a whole day to take off the chipped nail polish and apply this, so I thought why not take a picture of my achievement (I'm being sarcastic, don't reduce me to a stupid fat blond!!). I remember my sister once sent me a picture of girls holding perfumes to show their nail polish, but that wasn't me (perfumes are meant to be sprayed on!) So I went with something more suitable :p
The picture suck because I'm too lazy to take pictures with a camera then send it, so I just take it with my sucky BB camera. I can't sleep, so I won't shut up any time soon and it's only getting more incoherant so buckle up :p

- I hate vitamin C, it tastes like the devil's puke! Especially the yellow one that looks like pee, come to think of it, it even tastes like pee! Well, I haven't tasted pee but if I had to guess I'd say that it tastes like yellow vitamin C! I remember having to drink vitamin C for 2 months when my surgery wound wouldn't heel. And the wound wasn't even worth it, it was like three stitches ya3ny give me a break!! But my sister was like take it so the wound will heel and u won't have an ugly keloid (google it, it's nasty in a cool way!) and man those are nasty even to me and I'm a big fan of scars!!

- In case you all haven't noticed I'm sleep deprived because I'm breathing funny which is nasty and annoying! Not sleeping and being sick is making me bitchy and fowl mouthed. Well, more bitchy and fowl mouthed to be exact! Which is particularly bad since facebook's starting to be my only joy in life and you know how when u comment on someone's status and the friends of that someone acts all dumb and I really can't tolerate dumb so I tend to insult them which never ends well! Once someone told me off because I said "bitch please" which is stupid! She was like "Sumaiah you wrote a very bad word....." Lool wallah seriously she thought that that was bad! To me "bitch please" is like "look honey" in Sumaiah language!! Anyways, my sisters aren't helping too, even though they know that I'm suffering but they're like "yallah 3ad snap out of it", "stop being a bitch", "DO NOT INSULT MY FRIEND", "en6amay", and I'm like I can't stop being sick! And they're not really helping with taking care of their poor sick sister so how do they expect me to be other than nasty!!

I could see this going on forever, and I don't even think that anyone is still reading my sick babbling so I should wrap it up! But unfortunately for u, this won't be the end of it. There's plenty from where that came from for later :p
I want shorba, no one made me any yet! I feel so neglected! The needy de3la is waking up, good morning world!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

I'm Very Sick, Baby Me Damn it!!

The seasonal flu found it way to my system, thanks to my aunts and cousins! That's what you get from family, sanaseen oo araf!!

I hate being sick because I hate doctors and would never go see one unless the pain was so unbearable, and the flu is never that bad. I'm also known for being sick for months in a row because I never follow any treatment method, and I'm really not looking forward to that!

I'm being an extra de3la now that I'm sick oo want to be babied, bs mako fyda no one ma36eny wyh :(
I want chicken mushroom soup minus the mushroom without onions! I want it now, but I don't really like chicken soup so u all have to be creative :p
5ala9 I'll shut up bema ena ma 3endy salfa!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Thank You, But I'll Pass!

Yes I once said that you'll always be a part of my life, but time is showing me that that part could get smaller and soon be insignificant just like you're becoming smaller and insignificant to me.

Yes I said that leaving you was my biggest mistake, but time taught me that my biggest mistake could turn out to be the biggest blessing, and that's what leaving you have proven to be.

Yes I said that seeing you walk away is killing me slowly. Well, I must've lied because I'm growing stronger and more loved with each passing day.

Do you know what I felt when I saw you that day? Awkwardness! Not love, not pain, not regret, not longing, just awkwardness. I told you before that you don't have to forgive me for the bullet that I took for you, you just need to forgive me for moving on :)

Loving you and waiting for your love back prevented me from noticing other people who cared and still do. I'm glad that I've known you and I'm lucky that I no longer do!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

It's Been a month

So it's been a month since I applied for my dream job and still no answer. They said that if I was chosen to fill the vacancy they'll contact me within a month, so I guess this is it! It was "The Job", anything else won't be half as good.

I'm really really sick of being unemployed. I'm so desperate that I'm starting to regret rejecting elbaladeya! A couple of months ago I wouldn't even think twice about that awful place, but now I'm dreaming of being bored out of my mind while doing nothing as long as I'm sitting behind a disk!

I'm very depressed and unsatisfied! I don't want to be a couch potato anymore. I don't want to bake all day long, I didn't study my ass off to be Betty Crocker!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Ana el7ezaira!

El7ezaira is a game that two of my cousins and my older brother used to play with me. What's the game all about? It's all about protecting el7ezaira (me) from being hit by carrying me from place to place. What I'm not sure is whether 1 protects me from the other two who are trying to hit me, or the other way around. When they first told me about that game I was angry for being used at first, but then I couldn't help but feel treasured and important. I mean those boys fought for me! And even though they did it to entertain themselves, it still made me feel special.

What ruined everything for me though is that one of them grew up and thought of playing another game, he molested me! It's a shame though that two of them couldn't protect me from what one of them did!

On a lighter note, I'm guessing that erab6a elly 3alla rely foug is part of a leash that someone must've used for a different game:p

Friday, October 1, 2010

السبب وراء الصخة

الصورة المقلوبة ما عرفت أعدلها سو حطيتها جدي كيفكم!

مادري إذا في أحد تساءل ولا لأ بس راح أقولكم! مثل ما الكل يدري (من كثر ما حنيت) إنا توا صارت حفلتي التخرج. و بما اني ملكة التتنيح متنحة ناطرة أختي تدزلي صوري عشان اكتب بوست عن الحفلة. يمكن تسئلون ليش ما ادز الصور حق روحي؟ السبب الوحييد اني أنا حدي كسلانة!

المهم الحين بما إنا عندي صور طلعتي مع أهم انسانتين بحياتي ( ميشو أختي و نانا صديقتي الصدوقة) راح اكتب عنها.

رحنا أنا و ميشو و نانا ٣٦٠. طبعا أول مكان رحنا أهو جيان لأنا مكاني المفضل بالعالم كلا أهو الجمعية، مادري قاصيين سري هناك بس صج الحالة كسيفة! عقب صعدنا نلعب بولنق و مثل ما تشوفوون كلنا فاشلين بس أنا خسرت لأنا ميشو غشاشة، و نانا خسرت لأنها غبية تطووف اللاين! المهم كان حدا وناسة تكافخنا و ما ظل انحطاط ما انحطينالا (مادري شنو هذا يعني!) أحس يوم طلعنا اللي يشتغلوون هناك سوو عيد! بس كيفهم كان يومي و كيفي إذا بصارخ و أركض ورا الكرة (بغيت اندبغ على صماخي بس الحمد لله صماخي كبير يسوي توازن!).

اتعس شيء بالطلعة كان الشياب اللي حرقونا خز! يعني طالعيين من صباح الله خير عشان نتفادا الأوادم بس ماكو فايدة! بس أشدعوا نستحي ولا اثر فينا شي، احنا طالعين نستانس و الحمد لله هذا اللي سوينا :)

تونا درينا أختي لكبيرة نجحت بامتحانها عشان بترووح تكمل ماسترز، مبرووووك د. موفي:*